50 Shades Of Grey Rape

We’ve all heard stories from friends (and recently in the news), some of us have even been there but not many of us talk about it. We explore the most common 21st century form of sexual assault – grey rape, a term that has been used to blur the lines between consent and rape

- Pamela Victor

SITUATION 1

Jo**, a 35-year old career woman isn’t married and is completely fine with casual dating. She usually goes on dates she’s been matched with on dating apps. Her first dates usually include dinner and a couple of drinks, but no sexual activity whatsoever. Eight months ago, she went out with this guy C and really enjoyed his company. They had dinner and drinks and later he invited her over to his place for coffee before she left. She told him that she didn’t want to go over because of her first date rule but because she liked him so much she gave in and went over. As the night proceeded, they kept talking and getting more comfortable with each other. There was physical contact and as soon as he kissed her she said she can’t go further and he began sulking and getting annoyed. She felt bad and really was afraid that he wouldn’t be interested in her anymore so she just sat there quietly as he made his move. She kept saying no to everything he did but he just kept on forcing himself into her. She knew she wasn’t strong enough to push him away, and that he might turn aggressive. After he was done, she was in pain, physically and mentally, regretting and blaming herself for letting her guard down like that. She hasn’t been on another date since.

SITUATION 2