Maria

From The Book Of Love Stories comes this short story about a forlorn man, his toxic ex, and a stranger he meets at a bar.

“Maria is going to die this year. And I could die too, just to witness that temper of hers once more. To see the rush of blood to her face and fight that evil tongue of hers with my own, to let her determined little fists crash against my body in revolt. To see her wreck my car, kitchen and heart with measured recklessness.

She is a bad-tempered, ill-mannered, violent woman. And I’m not getting a taste of her bad medicine anymore. Except only seasonally, when she chases away a lover and I’m around to pick up the broken pieces of her heart. Then she lets me in, lets me make love to her, take her to movies and buy her things. Then her heart heals and she returns to being bad-tempered, ill-mannered and violent.

There are other words for this pattern, but I don’t like self-punishment. I fell out of love with her when she broke my heart years ago. I desire her, but there are always others. I’m not interested in setting her on the straight and narrow path—it’s against her nature. She would be lost there.