Clash Of The Cultures

The festive season is here, a time for many of us to unplug from the city life and return to our roots. These SA women share how their families celebrate.

- Yolisa Mjamba

During the holiday season, I always take time to reflect on my uMabo (traditional wedding), as it was the day I had to leave my family home. After all these years, I’m still drawn to that moment. In Zulu culture, a woman has to bid a proper farewell to her parents and ancestors before she gets married and becomes part of a new family. I’ll never forget the emotion on my father’s face as he lifted our family totem in the lounge and said goodbye in Zulu praise. The whole family got a little emotional in that moment, but we still managed to keep our makeup-laden faces intact and regained our cool. Sashaying out of our home with our babies in hand, and me in my Monaco dress that I was to wear for the last time, it symbolised a new era and the end of another.

What follows is a series of song and dance that plays out the unspoken language of our ancient traditions, the push and pull of partnership, the ups and downs of life, but most importantly, the amazing opportunity to love and be loved. Plus, we all looked so fabulous in our traditional beaded attires that we got from a local supplier, who also dressed the dapper Mabanga men in their Zulu clothing. I’m sure you’re wondering which one of my many outfits I loved the most. Yes, I changed into another gown for our reception after the lobola gift exchange and, frankly, I felt like a queen in all of them. After the mammoth journey that was our Monaco Christian wedding (vow renewal) and our weekend-long tjivovo (celebration), I was ready to go into hibernation.