How To Handle Valentine's Day In A New Relationship

Most of us would agree with George Eliot’s words, “I like not only to be loved, but also to be told I am loved.”

- John Pereira

Valentine’s Day for new couples may feel as awkward as a 10-ton gorilla doing ballet, given that your feelings for one another are very new and you’re not sure where your relationship is headed. Whether you’ve been on only one date or have been seeing each other for a few weeks, the dreaded red hearted holiday can make even the most confident darter feel insecure about how to approach the holiday. However, having a simple conversation about the holiday or picking a low-key gift or event can take the stress out of the day and turn it into something you enjoy.

Talking About It and Making a Plan

Ignore it if it’s too soon. If you’ve only been on a date or two, it’s probably best to ignore Valentine’s Day altogether. Jumping on a romantic holiday may push your potential date away, so it’s probably a good idea to skip it for this year.

Ask yourself what you really want. Think about how long you’ve been in the relationship, and how much you realistically expect the other person to contribute. If you think dinner and a card is reasonable, get the other person a card and ask him or her out to dinner on or near the day.

Talk to your new crush. One way to alleviate the stress is to simply talk to your crush about it. You can suggest keeping it low-key since you’re new to the relationship, as well as make a plan for a nice dinner or an outing if you’d like.

For instance, you could say, “Our relationship is still pretty new. Why don’t we keep Valentine’s Day low key? We could say no gifts, though cards are fine. Do you want to have a nice dinner together?”