Depression in men is now openly talked about, but less visible are the partners of sufferers, who endure corresponding lows and challenges. Grace O’Neill shares her personal story
I recently tweeted to my modest following that “Men know so much about politics and sport so they have something to talk about that isn’t Their Feelings”. It was an attempt to curate my “witty journalist” online persona, but also I’m convinced it’s true. During the past four years with my boyfriend, Zach, I have become intimately acquainted with the fallout of men’s inability to talk to one another with real depth.
Zach and I moved in the same social circles for years, but we actually met at a frat party at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA). We were both studying there on exchange: me, film; him, mathematics. We fell for each other quickly; Zach remains one of funniest, kindest and most intelligent people I’ve met.
We spent the next month holed up in our dorms drinking Napa Valley wine out of red college cups or rifling for vintage designer clothes at Silver Lake flea market. It was one of those whirlwind romances you feel won’t translate to real life, but our first two years together back in Sydney were pleasantly simple. When Zach was offered a graduate position at an investment bank in Hong Kong after we’d been discussing where to go next, he signed the contract and we began planning the move.
Looking back, signs were creeping in that things weren’t wholly OK. Sometimes Zach would spend entire days in bed for no apparent reason or go days without eating properly, and party much harder and more often than any of his friends. But everything could be chalked up to something. He stayed in bed for days because he’d partied all weekend; he wasn’t eating because banking jobs are stressful. When he started making big mistakes at work and becoming increasingly apathetic about the move to Hong Kong, it just felt as if he was realising the life of a high-flying investment banker isn’t actually all it’s cracked up to be.
هذه القصة مأخوذة من طبعة August 2018 من Harper's Bazaar Australia.
ابدأ النسخة التجريبية المجانية من Magzter GOLD لمدة 7 أيام للوصول إلى آلاف القصص المتميزة المنسقة وأكثر من 9,000 مجلة وصحيفة.
بالفعل مشترك ? تسجيل الدخول
هذه القصة مأخوذة من طبعة August 2018 من Harper's Bazaar Australia.
ابدأ النسخة التجريبية المجانية من Magzter GOLD لمدة 7 أيام للوصول إلى آلاف القصص المتميزة المنسقة وأكثر من 9,000 مجلة وصحيفة.
بالفعل مشترك? تسجيل الدخول
Grounded In Gotham
As she acclimatises to life under lockdown in her adopted city, model Victoria Lee reflects on fear, family and the fortitude of New Yorkers
Woman Of Influence Ingrid Weir
With a knack for elevating creative yet quotidian spaces and a love of bringing people together, the interior designer is crafting a sense of community among young artists.
CODE of HONOUR
At Chanel’s latest Métiers d’art showing, house alums Vanessa Paradis and daughter Lily-Rose Depp reflect on the red-carpet alchemy of Coco’s beloved bow, chain, camellia and ear of wheat.
Stillness in time
Acclaimed Australian fashion designer Collette Dinnigan’s new life in Italy has been a slowing down of sorts — but now, with coronavirus containment measures in play, life inside the walls of her 500-year-old farmhouse in Puglia has taken on a different cast, she writes
In the BAG
Aussie expat Vanissa Antonious from cult footwear brand Neous on going solo and stepping up her accessory offering.
uncut GEMMA
Forging her own path while paying it forward to the next generation, actor Gemma Chan is the (very worthy) recipient of the 2020 Women In Film Max Mara Face of the Future Award. She reflects on fashion, the Crazy Rich Asians phenomenon and red-carpet alter egos with Eugenie Kelly
THE TIME IS NOW
Esse Studios founder Charlotte Hicks’s slow-fashion model may just blaze a trail for the industry’s new normal. She talks less is more with Katrina Israel
COUPLES' THERAPY
Brooke Le Poer Trench ruminates on the trials and tribulations of too much time together
CALM IN A CRISIS
Caroline Welch was a busy woman who wrote a book on mindfulness for other busy women. Now, in the midst of a worldwide pandemic, she has started to take her own advice
ACCIDENTALLY RETIRED
As we settle into the new normal of lockdown, Kirstie Clements finds a silver lining in the excuse to slow down and sample the low-adrenaline lifestyle of chocolate digestives, board games and dressing down for dinner