Mom, I Wet The Bed

Night time incontinence in children can be a daunting phase for many parents, but it shouldn’t cause you or your child sleepless nights.

- Chris Hart

Children are terribly embarrassed when they wet the bed, but actually it’s almost a normal part of growing up. The most difficult thing is all the shame attached to it. Parents feel guilty about it, worrying that it must mean they’re bad parents. Or they blame the child. Children feel self-conscious and humiliated, and are afraid to go to sleepovers or to have friends to stay, because they’re afraid that they’ll make a mess or someone else will discover their secret.

But few children are dry at night below three years. Maybe 15 per cent of children still wet the bed at age five, but less than five per cent of 10-year-olds still have problems staying dry.

Many things can lead to bedwetting. It tends to run in families and is more common among boys than girls. It could just be that a child is sleeping particularly heavily. Or that their bladder control is developing more slowly than usual. Stress and anxiety can be a cause. So a child who’s been dry, and suddenly starts wetting the bed again, may be troubled about a big life change such as a house move.

One of the biggest fears around bedwetting is that it might be caused by some scary underlying problem. For instance, many parents have heard that serial killers used to wet their bed as children. But bedwetting is only one of many signs of future violence, so there’s no need to worry about it in isolation. Other parents fear that bedwetting is a sign that a child is being bullied or abused. Sometimes that is the case. But you should only be concerned if a child who’s previously been dry for a long time, suddenly starts bedwetting again.