The Great (Gay) Marriage Bureau

In a country that’s obsessed with getting hitched, but also criminalises sexual activities “against the order of nature”, 24-year-old Urvi Shah is helping the LGBTQ community find love through the Arranged Gay Marriage Bureau. With several success stories, and over 1,400 clients from Malda to Palampur, traditional matchmaking just got a 21st-century update.

- Ankur Paliwal

One late evening in June 2016, 33-year-old Purvish headed nervously towards the exit of Delhi’s Indira Gandhi International Airport. He’d flown in from Pune. His heart pounded in his ears as he stepped out of the airport, wearing a pink buttondown shirt and jeans. Soon his searching eyes met Manish’s, a well-built man in a black suit and a red tie, sporting a buzz cut that matched his designer stubble. He held a bouquet of peony roses.

Manish, equally nervous, had already smoked a pack of cigarettes by the time he reached the airport. They smiled and walked towards each other. Unsure if Manish would be comfortable with a hug or would think him clingy, Purvish leaned forward for a handshake. Manish hugged him. Their first hug, Purvish remembers, lasted nearly five minutes and gave him goosebumps. Then they looked at each other, and laughed out loud.

That was their first meeting after being matched by Arranged Gay Marriage (AGM), India’s first and only bureau that brings together people from the LGBTQ (Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Queer) community looking for a long-term relationship.

Before approaching the bureau, Purvish and Manish, who identify as gay, were frustrated with existing dating apps such as Grindr and Tinder. Most of the men they’d chatted with or met through these apps were either interested in hook-ups or quickly drove the conversation towards sex or their salary and investments. Some of these men weren’t out, some were married, some had put up fake profiles. Purvish was looking for a deeper connection, someone he could spend his life with. But he had no idea where he could find “the right guy”.