​A Self-Made Woman

Dixie Laite and O life coach Martha Beck meet for their final session—but for Dixie, this is just the beginning.

FOUR MONTHS AGO, freelance writer Dixie Laite, 55, longed for a higher purpose than binge-watching Law & Order. Why wasn’t destiny calling—had it lost her number? Then, in stepped Martha Beck. Over a few sessions with our resident life coach, Dixie has made great strides: She’s worked on thinking less and focusing more on her physical sensations, cultivating self-compassion, and paying attention to what brings her joy.

Last month Dixie told Martha about her idea for a blog called Dame Town, where she’d write about “old-fashioned dame heroes” and her own experiences. The hitch? She couldn’t actually get going. Martha recommended starting small. “You’re an animal, and your motivational system works the way an animal’s system works,” she said, advising Dixie to train herself the way you’d train a killer whale, setting tiny goals and giving plenty of treats. Every morning she’ll write for only ten minutes, then stop and give herself a reward; eventually, Martha assured her, she’ll be begging to do more. Let’s drop in to see whether Dixie’s been jumping through her hoops.

Martha Beck: I can’t believe this is the end of our time together! I miss you already. How are you these days?

Dixie Laite: Okay, first the good stuff: I’m blogging. People have already been sharing my posts on Facebook and giving me positive feedback. But I can’t lie; I didn’t do my writing every single morning. Sometimes I’d feel depressed or sleepy, and I’d skip it. But there were also days when I’d say, “I can do anything for ten minutes.” Once I started, I’d get so into it that I couldn’t make myself stop—even though I know you told me to.