Straight Talk with Jane

JANE KATARIA, AN EXPERT ON MINDFUL LIVING ANSWERS SOME OF OUR READER'S QUESTIONS.

- JANE KATARIA

1. My elder son is jealous of the younger one. He scratches him, takes away toys, pulls me away from him. What to do?

- It happens if a child's doesn't get enough attention from parents. The first thing parents should do is spend personal time with their older child, one on one. Thirty minutes a day or 1-2 hours on weekends. This should be quality time and something that your child loves. It could be hugging or reading, or playing hide and seek. It's important to identify what is the activity that gives him great feeling of being loved, making him or her important and worthy.

2. Shall I be forcing a child to do something around the house? Ignores my requests.

You shouldn't force, but you need to set a discipline, to motivate, toyou're your child interested in the responsibilities. Unfortunately you didn't mention your child's age. Depending on age I can give more exact recommendations.

3. The child is afraid to fight back against the offender. He argues that he could be hit even harder. How to react?

Children need to be taught to resolve conflicts without physical fights. This is the last resort. But if the other person doesn't understand the words at all, then it might be necessary to fight back and defend yourself. You need to work on your child's confidence. And I recommend to all mothers to enroll their sons to some martial art classes, where they can learn basic ethics, self-defense and gain confidence.

4. My child bites me when he doesn't like something. Should I bite him to teach that's its painful or be offended in response?