The mirror of feedback

Seek out other people's perceptions of you and adopt a practice of regular self-appraisal in order to learn and grow

When I was about to step into a senior position at work some years ago, my new boss asked my old manager what they needed to know about me: 'She loves regular feedback' was the answer given. And it was true - I do! The good, the bad, the ugly; I appreciate knowing where I stand and, more importantly, how I can improve (perhaps this taps into my 'good enough' blind spot). And I'm not alone. A recent LinkedIn report claims that four in ten employees are likely to become disengaged when they receive little to no feedback. So just how can someone else's observations positively challenge your outlook?

According to transformational coach and author Tamu Thomas, meaningful feedback can be an excellent opportunity for self-reflection and growth: 'It can help us to identify subconscious habits and patterns, and address professional biases, as it acts as a mirror reflecting back the parts we are unable to see,' she explains. "When we approach feedback with curiosity and a growth mindset, we can gain powerful insights into our impact on others and our environment.'

Abby Rawlinson agrees with this sentiment, adding that, 'Sometimes, we're too close to our own thoughts and beliefs to see them objectively, and it can be reassuring to hear from others that our concerns are unfounded.'

If you've ever felt excited for a professional win and then immediately full of self-doubt, Thomas assures that this is normal. 'It is not uncommon for us to find ourselves oscillating between joy and fear in our careers fear that we cannot keep up, and joy when our efforts are recognised,' she says. However, this can lead us to "foreboding joy", a term coined by social-work professor and researcher Brené Brown, where we are afraid to enjoy our success as we fear it won't last or that it will make us complacent,' she adds.