Of sticks and stones
New Zealand Listener|September 16 - 22 2023
They could send van de Molen to loom over Hipkins like Donald Trump did in that stomach-churning 2016 presidential debate with Hillary Clinton.
Michele Hewitson
Of sticks and stones

Consider the past two years. We've had Covid and floods and $7 cabbages. Haven't we had enough fear? Now we have "attack politics", courtesy of the Council of Trade Unions. There, looming on billboards and videos and a front page wrap-around on the New Zealand Herald - plus a full-page ad inside - was the mug of National leader Christopher Luxon. He was supposed to look vaguely evil, like a cross between Hannibal Lecter and Uncle Fester from the Addams family.

"Out of touch. Too much risk." Ouch. Not really. The CTU needs to get snappier slogan writers.

Nasty and pathetic, said the National Party's campaign manager, Chris Bishop. The Nats are being thin-skinned, said Prime Minister Chris Hipkins. And no, of course he had no foreknowledge of the ads. Bishop was asked how Uncle Fester, oops, Luxon was "holding up" against such a personal attack. "Look, he's big enough and ugly enough to handle it," he said. As endorsements go, that wasn't much better than the CTU's.

Tough times require tough guys, man. Hipkins' "thin-skinned" is meant to imply that Luxon is not a tough guy and that Hipkins is a thick-skinned tough guy who could withstand being called names.

National will not stoop to such nasty measures. "I think I'm modelling out a very positive campaign," said Luxon. Which gives rise to an image of the Leader of the Opposition sitting in his shed making model planes out of balsa wood and chucking them at Hipkins.

Bishop assured the country, "We are not going to be making personal jibes and attacks on Chris Hipkins and other senior members of the Labour Party in our attack ads." Okay. So the Nats will be unleashing attack ads, which, apparently, are perfectly fine as long as they don't portray Hipkins as a menace. He does look rather like Dennis the Menace. An attack-ad consultant would charge big bucks for that genius suggestion.

هذه القصة مأخوذة من طبعة September 16 - 22 2023 من New Zealand Listener.

ابدأ النسخة التجريبية المجانية من Magzter GOLD لمدة 7 أيام للوصول إلى آلاف القصص المتميزة المنسقة وأكثر من 9,000 مجلة وصحيفة.

هذه القصة مأخوذة من طبعة September 16 - 22 2023 من New Zealand Listener.

ابدأ النسخة التجريبية المجانية من Magzter GOLD لمدة 7 أيام للوصول إلى آلاف القصص المتميزة المنسقة وأكثر من 9,000 مجلة وصحيفة.

المزيد من القصص من NEW ZEALAND LISTENER مشاهدة الكل
First-world problem
New Zealand Listener

First-world problem

Harrowing tales of migrants attempting to enter the US highlight the political failure to fully tackle the problem.

time-read
3 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Applying intelligence to AI
New Zealand Listener

Applying intelligence to AI

I call it the 'Terminator Effect', based on the premise that thinking machines took over the world.

time-read
2 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Nazism rears its head
New Zealand Listener

Nazism rears its head

Smirky Höcke, with his penchant for waving with a suspiciously straight elbow and an open palm, won't get to be boss of either state.

time-read
2 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Staying ahead of the game
New Zealand Listener

Staying ahead of the game

Will the brave new world of bipartisanship that seems to be on offer with an Infrastructure Commission come to fruition?

time-read
4 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Grasping the nettle
New Zealand Listener

Grasping the nettle

Broccoli is horrible. It smells, when being cooked, like cat pee.

time-read
3 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Hangry? Eat breakfast
New Zealand Listener

Hangry? Eat breakfast

People who don't break their fast first thing in the morning report the least life satisfaction.

time-read
3 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Chemical reaction
New Zealand Listener

Chemical reaction

Nitrates in processed meats are well known to cause harm, but consumed from plant sources, their effect is quite different.

time-read
4 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Me and my guitar
New Zealand Listener

Me and my guitar

Australian guitarist Karin Schaupp sticks to the familiar for her Dunedin concerts.

time-read
2 mins  |
September 9, 2024
Time is on my side
New Zealand Listener

Time is on my side

Age does not weary some of our much-loved musicians but what keeps them on the road?

time-read
7 mins  |
September 9, 2024
The kids are not alright
New Zealand Listener

The kids are not alright

Nuanced account details how China's blessed generation has been replaced by one consumed by fear and hopelessness.

time-read
4 mins  |
September 9, 2024