'If we want big change in sports, we must take big steps'

Back from Paris, where she shot her way to Olympic glory, MANU BHAKER heaps praise on coach Jaspal Rana. In a free-wheeling interview with Vishal Menon and Anushka Bhardwaj in New Delhi, Bhaker lays bare her insecurities, and explains why she created a fake social media profile to defend PV Sindhu from trolls. Edited excerpts:

You were the face of India's Olympic campaign in Paris. With such media attention and so many brand deals, do you feel the weight of expectations?

Expectations have always been a part of my journey. They have been there since my victory in the 2018 Commonwealth Games. I am used to the pressure, but now it has reached another level. I am learning to deal with it.

Can you relive your twin Olympic medals?

I was having my own issues with the 10-metre format. I was not in a very good shape in 2022 and 2023, but Jaspal (Rana) Sir said that I could do it. We were seated in the [shooting] hall and I was soaking everything in, preparing myself mentally. If it wasn't for Jaspal sir, I wouldn't be where I am today. My family and friends were also there to motivate me.

Both the medals were equally important, but for mixed doubles, we only qualified for the bronze, which we went on to win.

Before the Paris Games, your form kept fluctuating. How did you keep yourself motivated?

In the beginning of 2023, I thought of quitting. Nevertheless, I tried to push myself until at least the 2024 Olympics. I was trying to keep up with my routine, but I was not in a good space. There is a saying in the Bhagavad Gita that nothing is permanent. Both good and bad forms shall pass. I kept reminding myself of this. I am a firm believer of karma.

During this period, you planned to appear for the civil services exam.