Older and wiser

The dos and don’ts of second (and subsequent) weddings, according to Arabella Youens

- John Holder

WHEN one of Jess Brooke Thom’s three daughters gave a speech at her wedding, she raised a peal of laughter by asking ‘third-time lucky, eh, Mummy?’ The setting, on a beach in Kenya, couldn’t have been more different from the country church in Hampshire where she had first tied the knot 30 years before.

Whatever the circumstances, any subsequent wedding should be dramatically different from the previous one. At her second, Jess battled morning sickness in a homemade dress. Her third wedding, however, struck an altogether different note: the barefoot ceremony was held on a beach at Watamu and followed by beach parties, a barbecue and an impromptu fertility ceremony (the couple, who are in their fifties, have nine children between them). ‘It was idyllic. We did it just how we wanted and with the people we wanted and the vows were our own.’

Francesca Leon and Rufus Hirsch took another route when they tied the knot last year in Old Marylebone Town Hall. They organised a no-frills event with only two witnesses and Francesca’s nine-year-old son as a ring bearer. Rufus had the rings made from salvaged gold. ‘It was a very simple ceremony, which was purely about the vows,’ says Francesca. ‘We had no readings or music—there was no one to entertain.’ They celebrated with lunch in a restaurant nearby.