I promise because I deserve better
I commit because I’ve been hurt before
I love because I know of otherwise
I stay because I know what loneliness looks like
I smile because I know how pain feels like
I care because I know what betrayal tastes like
I promise to be happy. I think at this point in life, I deserve some space and some growth to monetise on that. I need some exposure and some joy. I’ve been doing a grown-up job. I have worked for the money and followed my corporate calling. I haven’t spent decades doing it but I rant like you wouldn’t believe.
I know of no concept of graceful ageing or balding with pride. I had put on weight as a lady on a mission on behalf of my entire family. I’ve been working for a high-end corporate firm lashing out on financial statements and late-night deadlines.
Even when there's no work to be done, the cacophony of whirring printers and people smashing away on laptop keyboards is offputting.
I always told myself that nothing worthy comes easy and anything that slides into our laps ain’t here to stay. I’ve cried into my pillows and onto client rest room taps more in the last three years than before. I’ve lullabied myself to sleep with the taunts from seniors or from the pending work for the next day. I’ve counted hours left to hit the bed before even waking up. I’ve missed monumental events in the lives of my family and friends. I’ve grayed out of the lives of those I was the centre of. I’ve let my people down when they turned looking for me.
This story is from the January 2020 edition of Woman's Era.
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This story is from the January 2020 edition of Woman's Era.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
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