Separation Blues

For some little ones, absence makes the heart grow anxious. Find out how you can help ease the agonising pain of separation.

Be it day care or pre-school, the first day of school is an exciting time in a tot’s life. It provides them with new opportunities to interact with other children and teachers, while helping them learn and grow through a stimulating educational environment. Some children embrace this new experience with bravado and enthusiasm, but for some, saying goodbye is a cue for them to turn on the waterworks and have a full-on outburst. While the first day of school is a classic case, separation anxiety can occur anytime you leave your little one and is extremely common among children.

Most children begin to show separation distress when they are around six months old. At this stage of development, babies are still grasping the concept of object permanence; an understanding that things continue to exist even though they are out of sight. At the same time, they are also quickly learning who to trust and not to trust, causing them to become nervous when confronted with the unfamiliar.

“When my daughter Elaine was a baby, she was very used to being around me as I’m the primary caregiver since her birth, so even when daddy comes home from work and wants to carry her, she would refuse and only stop crying when she’s back in my arms again,” shares Mrs Jane Ho, 33, homemaker and mother-of-one.