When Mum Moves In​​​​​​​

When mothers and daughters set up house together as adults, it could be disastrous – or there could be mutual benefits and pleasure, says Venetia Sherson

- Venetia Sherson

MERREN & JANINE

When her conservationist daughter asked if Janine would like to quit her city granny flat and live with her on a secluded property near Raglan, she didn’t need to think twice...

Janine Cushing, 70, was considering moving into an Auckland retirement village, when her daughter Merren Tait, 40, came up with another option. ‘Why don’t we share a property?’ she said. At the time, Janine was living in a unit on her son and his family’s property in bustling New Lynn. Her home was bright and modern, with carefully tended flower and vegetable gardens planted when she moved in five years before.

Merren’s proposal was to share a secluded section, partially covered by native bush near Raglan, where the loudest sounds are the songs of tui, and the view is of Mt Karioi, an ancient volcano that rises sharply from the Tasman Sea. Access is by gravel road. Janine didn’t hesitate. “I knew when Merren came up with the plan, she was doing it for the right reasons, not out of duty or concern for me. I saw it as a wonderful change in my life.”

LIFE GOALS

The pair will live 20 steps from each other in separate, but identical 42 square-metre houses, modelled on sturdy DOC tramping huts. They will have livestock – sheep and chickens – and share produce from a large communal vege garden. They will sometimes – but not always – cook and eat together. Merren says they get on so well she can only see positives. “But we will respect each other’s privacy.”