DIANA & the duke

ROYAL WRITER INGRID SEWARD TELLS HOW HER ALLY BECAME THE ENEMY

When Diana first joined the royal family, she felt they had little understanding of what she was like – and she was right – but as time passed, she felt able to admit they had tried to be fair with her.

She had a great respect for the Queen and admired her for giving her whole life to duty, sacrificing personal pleasures and even her family life to fulfil what was required of her. Diana admitted she would have never been able to do the same, but had she been older and more experienced, she felt she would have been better equipped to face the problems she encountered.

In the early days of her courtship, such as it was, she opened up her heart to Prince Charles, telling him in copious letters how her spirits lifted when they were together, how she was head over heels in love with him and got butterflies in her stomach when she was with him. And most importantly, how she was looking forward to spending the rest of her life with him.

As the wedding approached, however, she started to have misgivings. She found out very early on about Prince Charles’ friendship with Camilla Parker Bowles and became fixated about her. Diana convinced herself that because of Camilla, Charles’ heart wasn’t really in the marriage. The night before the wedding, she lay in bed at Clarence House and thought about calling off the wedding. If she had been more confident, she might have been able to talk to Prince Philip about her fears, as he had suffered similar misgivings, but she did not.