'You won't catch a royal in a onesie'

Grant Harrold, the former butler of King Charles III, looks back at his time working in the royal household with great fondness

- Josie Copson

Grant Harrold, 45, was a royal butler to King Charles III between 2004 and 2011. Here, he reveals some of the golden rules in royal households, and what Charles was really like to have as a boss…

THE GOLDEN DINNER RULES

“The royal household is very traditional with their dinner party rules. The gentlemen will always wait until all the ladies are present before they sit down and, if they can, they will assist the ladies to their seats first. Guests then place napkins on their lap – if the ladies use their napkin to dab their lipstick, they fold it over so the stain isn’t visible. The napkins are big enough so that this can be done several times.

“Charles always sits at the top of the table, and the more senior people, like other royals and prime ministers, will sit closest to him. The food is then served to those at the top first.

“During the starter and main course, the royals always speak to the guest sitting on their right. After the main course and throughout dessert, it’s the guest sitting on their left. This creates a knock-on effect along the whole table, so everyone has always got someone to talk to. In terms of conversation topics – sex, religion, money and politics are always off limits.

“The only time where it’s suitable to go to the bathroom is after the main course as that’s when one conversation ends.

“Guests attending a royal dinner aren’t given etiquette lessons – you’d be surprised how quickly people pick things up. They follow the lead of the royals or the more experienced guests.”