"WE COME TO THIS PLACE for magic. (Walks through front door, smiles with knowing anticipation) And for envelopes. For the magic of envelopes. We come to Staples to laugh, to cry, to care. Because we have an abiding passion for office supplies. All of us. (Conspiratorial nod) That indescribable feeling we get when we walk down the "Filing" aisle and run our fingers along a twenty-four-pack of three-tab manila folders, and we go somewhere we've never been before. (Look of blissful transport) Not just happily accepting the fact that, without a real office to go to anymore, we now have to pay for things like pens, but somehow fuelled with an irresistible desire to own ten of every width of Sharpie. (Gazes gobsmacked at various displays) Post-its plentiful enough to cover a medium-sized city. Pencil sharpeners, pencil holders... pencils. Somehow, O.C.D. feels good in a place like this. Our Pendaflex accordion folders feel like the best part of us, and ninety-nine dollar printers feel perfect and powerful and not doomed to break in six months because here (looks directly at camera)... they are." (Hypnotizes viewers into downloading the Staples Rewards app)
Diese Geschichte stammt aus der February 13 - 20, 2023 (Double Issue)-Ausgabe von The New Yorker.
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Diese Geschichte stammt aus der February 13 - 20, 2023 (Double Issue)-Ausgabe von The New Yorker.
Starten Sie Ihre 7-tägige kostenlose Testversion von Magzter GOLD, um auf Tausende kuratierte Premium-Storys sowie über 8.000 Zeitschriften und Zeitungen zuzugreifen.
Bereits Abonnent? Anmelden
YULE RULES
“Christmas Eve in Miller’s Point.”
COLLISION COURSE
In Devika Rege’ first novel, India enters a troubling new era.
NEW CHAPTER
Is the twentieth-century novel a genre unto itself?
STUCK ON YOU
Pain and pleasure at a tattoo convention.
HEAVY SNOW HAN KANG
Kyungha-ya. That was the entirety of Inseon’s message: my name.
REPRISE
Reckoning with Donald Trump's return to power.
WHAT'S YOUR PARENTING-FAILURE STYLE?
Whether you’re horrifying your teen with nauseating sex-ed analogies or watching TikToks while your toddler eats a bagel from the subway floor, face it: you’re flailing in the vast chasm of your child’s relentless needs.
COLOR INSTINCT
Jadé Fadojutimi, a British painter, sees the world through a prism.
THE FAMILY PLAN
The pro-life movement’ new playbook.
President for Sale - A survey of today's political ads.
On a mid-October Sunday not long ago sun high, wind cool-I was in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, for a book festival, and I took a stroll. There were few people on the streets-like the population of a lot of capital cities, Harrisburg's swells on weekdays with lawyers and lobbyists and legislative staffers, and dwindles on the weekends. But, on the façades of small businesses and in the doorways of private homes, I could see evidence of political activity. Across from the sparkling Susquehanna River, there was a row of Democratic lawn signs: Malcolm Kenyatta for auditor general, Bob Casey for U.S. Senate, and, most important, in white letters atop a periwinkle not unlike that of the sky, Kamala Harris for President.
