Let this be the end of these excruciating celebrity endorsements

I wish celebrities would learn the art of the French exit. But they can't, which is why Eva Longoria has announced she no longer lives in America. "I get to escape and go somewhere," she explained.

- Marina Hyde

"Most Americans aren't so lucky - they're going to be stuck in this dystopian country." What's brought this on, apart from the obvious? "Whether it's the homelessness or the taxes ... it just feels like this chapter in my life is done now." America's loss of this major political thinker is another country's gain- and this highly called-for intervention reminds us why celebrities should speak their brains even more often. If only into a pillow, or an abyss.

As always in these moments of the silly voters making a silly mistake, many stars have pledged to follow her.

We'll see. Either way, celebrities seem totally unaware that these high-handed statements of migration are not the admonishment to the lesser orders that they are meant to be, and may even encourage them.

But then, stars have always been totally unaware of how little they bring to this party. The last few days of the Harris campaign were an excruciating riot of celebrity bandwagoning. Did the Kamala campaign ask Richard Gere to make his video for her - or did the actor freelance one out of fear of not having "used his platform"? It was certainly Richard's most critically misunderstood electoral outing since his address to the Palestinians before their 2005 elections. "Hi, I'm Richard Gere," it began, "and I'm speaking for the entire world..."