Family Drama Is Just Part of The Business

JENNIFER DAVIS

broker, Maison Real Estate, Charleston, S.C.

The client had inherited this house in Charleston, a very significant house. I was fairly new to the business, and he was interviewing a couple of brokers. He said, "I'd like to give you the listing, but there's one thing: Could you pick up a painting that belongs to me, that's at another house down the street?" I said I wouldn't mind at all. So a day later, I went over to another very big Charleston house and knocked on the door. A woman answered and showed me into the front hall. I introduced myself, and we talked about her house, which was lovely. Then I said, "I'm going to list the house across the street, and I understand there's a painting here that belongs to that house. I am here to pick it up, if you don't mind."

I didn't know she was my client's ex-sister-in-law, divorced from his brother. I thought she was just holding onto the painting for him. Well, that wasn't the case at all. She liked having that painting. I guess the brother didn't want to get involved in getting it back. It was something lawyers had probably discussed at some point.

The woman looked at me and just kind of contemplated for a second. She wasn't going to be rude to me. That's not how it works in Charleston. It's the land of civility here. Then she said, "You can get it out right now. Take it." The painting was hanging in the front room. It was of a woman in period dress, I would guess from the 1880s, in a big gold frame. I didn't really anticipate the painting being that big. There was no way it was going to fit in my car. She helped me get it off the wall. Then I got out the door and down the big steps with the painting, and just walked down the street, teetering, to the other house, arms spread wide. The client was like, "Fantastic! You definitely have the listing!" I didn't know what I was walking into. I hadn't been living in Charleston long enough to know everyone's divorces. I know a lot more now.

KIM LATOUR

licensed real estate agent, The Corcoran Group, New York, N.Y.

It was a beautiful house on the coast of Maine, with a small beach. The owner and his wife also had a house in Florida, so they frequently went back and forth. I had a big showing with a really great potential buyer they were coming with their agent. I got there first. Where this house was, there was never a locked door. I opened the door and stepped into the foyer saying, "Hello, hello," out of courtesy, and almost fell over when this deep voice of a man says, "What? Hello?"

I looked up and on the balcony is a naked man, holding his hands in front of him. He said, "Oh my God, please don't tell my brother." I said, "I have a showing, put your clothes on!" He said, "Our clothes are in the washer." And out steps the most gorgeous naked woman.

Apparently, these two people had just met, and he was pretending to be the owner. They'd had an allnight party. The kitchen was a disaster; every pot and pan was out. There were clam-shells and mussel shells and beer bottles all over the pool table in the billiard room. They went out on the beach in a blanket. I was shoving pots and pans and dirty glasses in closets and the dishwasher when the doorbell rang.

The potential buyers were a judge and his wife. After going through the main house, we went up to the guesthouse. Then the buyer's broker says, "Kim, I don't know what's going on here, but there's a truck going down the driveway with about 150 chairs on it." I run back down to the main house. They're unloading the chairs on the beach, and the canoodlers in the blanket are chatting with the man who's arrived with the truck. It's another relative of the owner-his nephew. The nephew says, "We're going to have a wedding here tomorrow." I said, "Do you have permission?" He says, "Not officially." Believe me, he did not.

The canoodlers say, "Hey, maybe we should get married!" I called the owner, who was furious. He talked to the brother and the nephew on the phone right then and there, told them to get out of his house and don't come back. He felt betrayed. He felt violated. But then he got very happy. He got an offer. The house sold at $1.7 million.