CRISIS AND TRANSFORMATION

SUZANNE MARRIOTT's beautiful memoir on caregiving, published this month, began taking shape years ago with conversations at a S+H writer's workshop.

- SUZANNE MARRIOTT

HE COULDN’T GET INTO HIS TRUCK.

This is how it started: Michael couldn’t climb into the cab of his eighteen-wheeler because his arms and legs wouldn’t work.

It doesn’t make sense. This is supposed to be the day when the exhaustion finally lifts; after a year of working nights, he’s finally back on the day shift. Now he’s telling me he said no to an ambulance (an ambulance?) and somehow managed to drive home in our Honda to call me instead.

My hands tighten on the phone as I struggle to take in his words. Has he had a stroke? A heart attack? Did he fall?

“Call the clinic and try to get an appointment right away with Dr. Roberts.” His voice is strained.

Suddenly I have to be with him, not sitting here making phone calls. “I’m on my way home right now,” I tell him. There’s a pause. Then he tells me to make the call first. He will lie down and see if that helps.

Somehow my fingers punch the buttons on the phone. Someone answers and switches me to the emergency line. “How may I help you?” The nurse’s voice is cheerful.

“Something has happened to my husband—I don’t know what. He’s a truck driver, and he couldn’t get up into his truck.”

“Is he conscious?”

“Yes, he called me.”

I quickly give her Michael’s medical record number.

“You shouldn’t have been put through to this line. It’s only for life-and-death situations. Please hold.”