Sweat poured off me as I tossed and turned in bed. It was July 2016, and at 20st 5lb, I was struggling to cope with an intense heat wave. Rolling out of bed the next morning, I felt dreadful. ‘I can’t do this any more,’ I sighed to my husband, Paul. At my heaviest weight, I’d had enough, and knew I needed to change.
Ever since I was a child, eating had been my comfort. While Mum dished up healthy meals at home, at my gran’s house at the weekends I’d scoff homemade cakes, biscuits and pies.
At 16, I left school to train to be a nurse. I loved the work, but the long hours and stressful shifts left me turning to food. There I was surrounded by temptation – cakes and sweets brought in by other staff or grateful patients. Rushing around on the ward with barely enough time for a break, I’d grab a handful of sugary treats and stuff them in my mouth. ‘That’ll do for dinner,’ I’d joke to colleagues. But it wasn’t a joke – I really didn’t have time or energy to eat anything better.
Aged 18, I tragically lost my dad in a car accident. As I ate through my grief, my weight ballooned. I tried multiple diets and slimming clubs, but it was the same story every time. I’d lose a few pounds, then pile them all back on.
By the time I was 23 I weighed 14st, at 5ft 4in, and after I had my son in 1988, my eating habits got worse. Being a single mum was tough, and after putting my son to bed I’d rummage in the cupboards for chocolate and biscuits. Alone on the sofa, I’d binge. I ate to cope with the loneliness, just as I’d eaten to cope with my grief.
LOSING CONFIDENCE
Diese Geschichte stammt aus der April 24, 2023-Ausgabe von WOMAN'S OWN.
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Diese Geschichte stammt aus der April 24, 2023-Ausgabe von WOMAN'S OWN.
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