The Pressures Of Parenting

Parents carry a different mental load today than they did just decades ago, making our job as caregivers more emotionally complicated than ever. Here’s how the pressures of modern-day parenting are affecting our mental health – and why putting our needs as parents first may be the way forward in prioritising our children.

-  AMY GREENBURG

“Parents naturally want the best for their children and often work tirelessly to provide them with everything they want or need. This is something parents have done through the course of time. However, incidence and expectations of doing so appear to be higher now,” explains DR SANVEEN KANG, a clinical psychologist and founder of Psych Connect. She helps families manage mental health issues and provides comprehensive psychological testing and therapy for ages two and up, into the early adult years.

Parental expectations have changed in recent times, with the likes of shifting family dynamics, gender expectations, social media saturation and a worldwide pandemic forcing us to re-jig our worklife balance. While some positives have come with these changes, so have additional layers of pressure.

On the one hand, we’re told to be more present as parents. Yet technology has created an expectation of always being accessible to workers and friends. We work ourselves ragged to provide everything for our kids but then get judged for not spending enough quality time with them. We feel the pressure to keep up with unrealistic parenting standards splashed across social media, only to feel inadequate when we can’t meet them.

But, we keep trying, regardless of whether we have the time and resources to do so. This has the capacity to send some of us into a spiral of anxiety, stress and self-doubt.