Proud To Be Different

Despite some progress, we still face stigma if we are anything but neurotypical. But what is ‘normal’ and do we really want to aspire to it, asks Deborah

- Deborah Hill Cone

Things that are having a trendy moment right now: vegan sneakers, eco masking, snackable CBD – and also, maybe, letting your freak flag fly. At least that’s what I hoped.

Hands up if, like me, you thought we’ve been through a bit of a revolution where people feel emboldened to show their true selves in all their weirdo glory? Yee-haa!

I’m thinking of things like the success of comedian Hannah Gadsby’s standup show Nanette, the body positivity of Shrill writer Lindy West and the growing awareness about gender fluidity, disabilities and discrimination about mental health and all the things that get labelled SJW (social justice warriors) by angry men in baseball caps who think “intersectionality” is something to do with traffic jams.

I seriously thought those of us who are not ‘neurotypicals’ – or have kids who are a bit different (ASD, ADHD, dyslexia, pick your own spectrum) – may finally get to come out from the numpties class.

As Hannah says, we can make a better world if we learn to see it from all perspectives. “Because diversity is strength. Difference is a teacher. Fear difference, you learn nothing.” (Love her).

And this enlightenment movement was going to last longer than other things we love today but hate tomorrow: neurodiversity is not a trend like Gucci fake fur loafers. No one was ever going to say “Smashing the patriarchy is so last season!”

But if you have a special needs child or feel a bit special needs yourself, you will understand that despite the little bits of lovely progress, the shiny happy normative people you see in stock photos still dominate the world. I thought we were woke but we’re actually still half asleep.