HOW TO JUST SAY NO!

Holidays are a time to shrug off the things you do out of guilt or a sense of obligation and focus on the things that make you happy and relaxed

- LESEGO SEOKWANG

LONG afternoon naps, blissful days lazing next to the pool, and hours of binge-watching TV heaven... After a long, hard year these may be the things you're looking forward to as you count down the days until you can switch off your computer and start your end-of year holiday.

But deep down you know there's almost zero chance of any of this rest and relaxation actually happening.

Your kids are already filling up every day with activities from ten-pin bowling and putt-putt to going to the beach.

Your partner is nagging you to help with that pesky DIY project you've been putting off all year. And in between all of this there will be family braais, catchups with distant relatives, and new year parties with friends.

So, in short, no time for that R&R you're craving. In fact, once the break is over, you'll probably feel even more tired than before it started.

Is this really the way you want to go into 2023?

Although the holiday season is hyped as the happiest time of the year, for many people it's a minefield of social obligation - they don't want to disappoint anyone so they accept every invitation that comes their way, and at the end of it all they feel physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted.

Holiday burnout is definitely a thing, says Joburg-based relationship expert, author and mental-health activist Paula Quinsee.

Here's expert advice on what you need to do to navigate the holidays so you get family time and also get the rest you so desperately need.

PRACTISE HEALTHY SELFISHNESS

Selfishness doesn't sound very festive. But when done in a certain way it shows you understand your personal capacity and limitations and agree to take part in life within those boundaries, explains Nelly Mohale, head of human capital solutions at Joburg financial solutions company Decusatio.