SAY NO TO THE DRAMA

A new book offers tips on how to deal with toxic and dysfunctional family relationships so you can find peace and live life your way

- NEDRA GLOVER TAWWAB

IT’S been three years since the world changed forever, a virus sending us either into isolation or forced closeness with loved ones and not-so-loved ones in our midst.

During this time many of us contemplated the state of our closest relationships and what the people in our lives meant to us.

For some, there was a dawning realisation that life was much more pleasant without having to deal with that needy mother, that passive-aggressive sister-in-law or that booze-soaked uncle.

But now that life has returned to normal, we may face a new surge of emotions as that mandatory distance has been closed. We may feel angry, upset or even guilty, and filled with a desire to remedy those relationships now that they’re back in our lives.

Of course, it’s easier said than done, as anyone with fraught family tensions will tell you. And it might not actually be the best thing to try to keep those relationships going as they were.

In her book Drama-Free, American relationship expert Nedra Glover Tawwab offers practical, empowering strategies for identifying and breaking toxic family dynamics and addressing the problem of what to do when all your attempts to heal a broken relationship have failed.

KELLY had a tumultuous relationship with her brother Jeff. He had a slicing way with words, he had a history of manipulating their entire family to get what he wanted, and he acted entitled.

Their other two siblings no longer had a relationship with him, and even refused to show up at Kelly’s home if Jeff was there. But Kelly hung on because she felt she was the only person he had. Despite being burned by her brother over and over, Kelly continued the relationship, hoping that he would change.

CHANGE IS HARD, AND WORTH IT