A snakes & ladders journey

After a shock cancer diagnosis, Sandra Russell looked for a book that would help her connect with her emotions. She searched fruitlessly, then decided to write one herself.

-  SHARON STEPHENSON

Sandra Russell’s life hasn’t always been a patchwork of pills and hospital visits. There was a time when the 62-year-old didn’t know how to inject herself in the stomach or which were the most comfortable seats in the chemotherapy ward.

But in 2013, Russell was diagnosed with stage 2 multiple myeloma, a type of incurable blood cancer. Since then, the Aucklander has had two cell-transplant operations, two rounds of chemotherapy, two remissions, a bout of pneumonia that almost killed her and so many nights in hospital she’s lost count.

“There have been a lot of snakes and ladders in this journey,” says Russell, with a smile.

It’s why we’re chatting today: she recently wrote her first book, The Feeling of Cancer, about her experiences. In 172 unflinchingly honest pages, Russell plots her journey through the cancer maze, not in medical terms but in emotional ones.

“This is the book I wanted to read when I was diagnosed, to help me make sense of what I was going through,” says Russell in an accent that still holds traces of her Yorkshire upbringing.

“There were lots of great books about dealing with cancer – about the drugs and doctors and medical side of it – but I couldn’t find one that put feelings first or looked at the often-dehumanising experience of living with cancer through an emotional lens. I wanted to know what cancer patients were thinking and feeling. As a reader and writer, I always look for the personal connection as a way to connect with my own emotions and find peace.

“I wrote this book because I couldn’t find one like it.”