Minnows can make splash of a whale

ACCORDING to Donald J Trump – you may have heard of him – “losers” are the lowest of the low, “suckers” and “schmucks”. One of the founding principles of what might loosely be called his philosophy, it applies even to the military.

“He’s not a war hero,” Trump said of Senator John McCain, who had spent six years as a prisoner in Vietnam. “I like people who weren’t captured.”

This makes the 45th President just the chap to run the “player of the match” operation when the 2031 Rugby World Cup takes place in the United States, always assuming he isn’t busy being the 47th President or trying to find a way out of jail. How so? Because in top-level professional rugby, losers no longer merit a first glance, let alone a second, when it comes to the glittering prizes.

Across the 48-game programme at the recent tournament in France – who knows how many there will be in eight years’ time, once the genius class at World Rugby have cast their net widely enough to include Vatican City, Antarctica, and Mothercare in the main draw – no fewer than 46 of the officially anointed Most Valuable Players were from the winning teams.

The exceptions were Jeronimo Portela, the Portugal playmaker adjudged to be the main man in the drawn pool game with Georgia, and his fellow outside-half Lima Sopoaga of Samoa, who, miracle of miracles, finished first in the ratings despite finishing second on the scoreboard.