Police play ball with footie ace

HERE’S a tip for you next time your house is burgled – tell them you’re a super-rich footballer.

Because as an average Joe you’ve got as much chance of anyone being caught and prosecuted as there is of Mr and Mrs Shy keeping it zipped about how terrible their charmed lives are.

Latest statistics show burglary victims are being failed by a “postcode lottery” when it comes to police investigations.

The HM Inspectorate of Constabulary found solving break-ins isn’t a major priority for many forces.

The crimes are rarely deemed to fall into the “high harm” category, meaning they are not fully investigated.

High harm? Are they joking? Being burgled is one of the most distressing things that can happen to you.

But in reality the police just don’t care.