Well you've already taxed the pants off everything, and you're dirty stinking liars to boot.
Saint Nigel's resurrection aside, I suspect that's the sum take away from the general election campaign this week for about 99.5 per cent of us.
To put it mildly, it's been somewhat tedious. Yet in all the confected noise about tax this week, it looks like Jeremy Hunt did actually hit a bullseye, even if he doesn't quite know how yet. The arrow came yesterday in a typical campaign punt when the Chancellor challenged his likely successor to rule out raising any of the current taxes on property.
Pointedly, Rachel Reeves didn't. And that's because some Labour big brains familiar with her thinking say this is precisely what she is most likely to do in her first Budget.
She is, I hear, looking very closely at an array of tax increases on wealth, and the creation of new council tax bands for more expensive homes is at the top of her list.
First, the why. Starmer and Reeves face a truly dire economic inheritance.
To pay for his own tax cuts (and lay a dastardly trap for Labour), Hunt is bequeathing them a very big hole in the public finances to the tune of around £20 billion a year.
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