Steve Barclay's plea comes as senior Tories call for tougher action amid fears that trade unionists are attempting to push the Conservatives from power.
Mr Barclay asked Royal College of Nursing general secretary Pat Cullen to formally notify employers of strike plans "without delay" so they can prepare for the walk-out.
Nurses are expected to strike on December 15 and 20 unless they win a 19 per cent pay rise.
Ms Cullen said she would only agree to talks if the Government negotiates a new pay deal.
Mr Barclay urged her to "reconsider", saying he was "disappointed you've taken this unprecedented step".
He wrote to the RCN urging its representatives to "come back to the table" for talks, and a Whitehall source suggested these could include subjects such as pension arrangements, holidays, rosters and the availability of free coffee.
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