How to speak to toddlers so they'll actually listen

A child psychologist shares some sage advice for dealing with little ones.

- LAUREN TAYLOR

THE toddler years come with a whole set of new challenges - and, for parents, communication skills during the most difficult times can be key.

Child psychologist Laverne Antrobus says tone of voice is crucial.

"You have to be a bit of an actor [as a parent] - nobody tells you when you have children about all the different roles that you're going to have to inhabit. One minute, you're being the clown one minute, you're being the investigator." Antrobus is backing a new Department for Education campaign to encourage more people to work in early years childcare, as a new £1,000 sign-on bonus for new starters and returners to the sector in 20 local authorities is announced from April - and she believes the skills to talk to toddlers are seriously underrated.

She says they can help prepare children "for the rest of their educational life" and how they are spoken to holds so much influence as they grow up. Here's her advice for communicating with toddlers during three key moments of the day.

When they say 'no'

If your toddler seems full of resistance for doing certain things, whether it's playing something new or getting dressed, it can be tempting to put your foot down. But Laverne suggests reframing their 'no' in your mind.

"Embrace it as an expression from your child of not quite knowing what to do. [It's their] quick way of maybe cutting off a request, because in that moment they just really don't understand what's going on.