'My ex secretly drugged me'
The Independent|November 03, 2024
Domestic abuse survivor Hannah tells Maya Oppenheim she felt 'degraded' and 'violated' by the actions of her ex-partner
'My ex secretly drugged me'

It took a year for Hannah's* abuser to start to show his true colours - when he began telling her to lose weight and banning her from cutting her hair, or dyeing it particular shades. But at the beginning of the relationship, she thought everything was perfect. Her partner had love-bombed her, told her she was his dream woman and called her an amazing mother.

“He would make you feel really secure and like you were the one,” Hannah tells The Independent. “He would say, ‘I look at other women and there is nothing I would change about you, you’re perfect’.” However, as the relationship progressed, he became steadily more possessive and controlling, isolating her from her family and taking her money.

“If he thought I shouldn’t have the money or I didn’t do what he wanted, he would transfer it out,” Hannah says. “He would use the same system loan sharks use, where I would borrow £100 and then owe him £200.”

It comes as The Independent continues its Brick by Brick campaign, in partnership with the leading domestic abuse charity Refuge, to raise funds to build two houses for women escaping abusive partners. The initial £300,000 target has recently been reached thanks to generous donations from readers, with more than £500,000 of donations having poured in so far, and plans are already underway for the building of a second home.

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