Christmas can be the most wonderful time of the year, for some. But for others, the decision on how and where to spend Christmas can be fraught with difficult family dynamics, cost-of-living-fuelled anxiety or feelings of overwhelming sadness to be spending the day alone. It can be a tricky path to navigate, and therapist and author Jana Firestone says the key is to be clear about what a joyful holiday period looks and feels like for you. “If the current traditions aren’t working for you, try something new,” says Jana. “Is there a way to celebrate that takes the pressure off and creates new and positive memories?”
A fair split
“If you’re juggling different events, discuss how it can be managed well ahead of the time,” advises clinical psychologist Elisabeth Shaw. “By doing good preparation and working out a game plan, you can get expectations down to a reasonable level. Some disappointment will probably be part of the deal, such as leaving an event early to get to another one, or even missing something every second year.”
If both sides of the family are local, spending Christmas Eve with one side, then Christmas Day with the other is a decent compromise, but can still be fraught with angst if you are battling expectations. “If your view is shaped by the fear of getting into trouble with your family, then your partner could well resent that,” says Elisabeth. “It’s better to work through those feelings to a place where you can own and assert your own preferences.”
Lower expectations
Esta historia es de la edición December 11, 2023 de New Zealand Woman's Weekly.
Comience su prueba gratuita de Magzter GOLD de 7 días para acceder a miles de historias premium seleccionadas y a más de 9,000 revistas y periódicos.
Ya eres suscriptor ? Conectar
Esta historia es de la edición December 11, 2023 de New Zealand Woman's Weekly.
Comience su prueba gratuita de Magzter GOLD de 7 días para acceder a miles de historias premium seleccionadas y a más de 9,000 revistas y periódicos.
Ya eres suscriptor? Conectar
The perfect GETAWAY
From lengthy airport clinches to party ghosting, Michéle examines goodbyes
Message in a BOTTLE
Kevin makes a discovery in his shed that piques his detective skills
Empowered & thriving! PERFECT AT ANY AGE
Weekly editor Marilynn bravely shares her bold new approach to living her best life at 50 and beyond
Nature goals FIND YOUR GREEN SPACE
From stressed to refreshed! Lifestyle medicine practitioner Dr Jenny Brockis shares the simple steps you should adopt to give your wellbeing a boost
Nature & the city KELLY & MARLEY'S WILD PROJECT
The podcaster’s eyes have been opened to a new way of life
TikTok star Paris 'I'M BRINGING OUR KAI TO THE WORLD
After a tough start to motherhood, the foodie tells how she reclaimed her life
Love and the city! WENDYL'S CHANGE OF HEART
After a decade in the country, she’s given up the good life to return home
New TV star Andy 'I THOUGHT BEIN AN ALL BLACK WAS TOUGH!' Кро
It was a big shift channelling his talent into the hit show Moving Houses, but the sporting legend is a natural
Babies and beyond! INES HEALS BRAD'S HEART
The actor is embracing life with his zero-drama’ partner
Spreading the joy SIR ASHLEY'S KINDNESS CLUB
The Kiwi health legend is taking a jab at teaching kids important life skills