MADE TO BE BROKEN

AND PUT BACK TOGETHER AGAIN

- KRISTIN BUTCHER

In the world of mountain biking, and general adult tomfoolery for that matter, I’m an outlier.

Correction. I was an outlier.

When post-ride discussions turn to tales of broken bones and other assorted injuries, folks point to different parts of their bodies, rattling off injuries like they’re padding a résumé of misfortune. Whenever the proverbial talking came to me, I’d do my best to regale the group with the story of my one and only stitch, the consequence of 8-year-old me stepping on a sewing needle.

After 41 laps around the sun, my poor decisions and penchant for stupid human tricks should have garnered a broken bone or an ER-worthy gash several times over. After all, I ride with a style that blends calculated technical maneuvering with reckless abandonment. This is backed by video evidence of me racing my bike while wearing roller skates and hopping my road bike over landscaping boulders with mixed success.

Off the bike, I’ve dabbled in rock climbing, gymnastics and judo. I abuse adult swim time at the city pool to practice my (terrible) back flips and still aspire to learn how to do a kickflip one day, even though I can’t technically skateboard yet. I’ve secretly looked up YouTube videos to learn how to do a back walkover because this seems like a useful skill to acquire in your 40s.

If I was a betting woman, I wouldn’t have bet that sledding would take me out. Of course, anyone who heard me agree to send it down a sledding hill with a fence at the bottom may have played their cards differently. Also, there may have been Teflon spray involved, but I digress.