I tried to kill myself at least 8 or 9 times last year
I’m still in recovery. It’s an hour-by-hour thing for me. Just getting out of bed and doing normal things is a battle. Some days I don’t even want to do that. I’m an addict and if I want drugs, I’ll find them. I can get where water can’t.’ Speaking exclusively to Now, Danniella Westbrook, 43, is a shadow of her former self. She admits to us that at her height of drug addiction she was taking up to 11 packets of cocaine a day – and she cries as she tells us: ‘I look at myself in the mirror and I feel sick.’
There’s a surprising vulnerability about Danniella. She seemed to have turned her life around, having her nose rebuilt, being clean for 15 years and entering the CBB house last January. Her popularity saw her bag fifth place, but with renewed stardom came old demons. After having dental implants as well as a boob job – which she shows us went drastically wrong, leaving her with wonky breasts – Danniella started using again.
‘Everything had been going so well. It was supposed to be my year, but then the teeth implants didn’t take and I became so low. I’m an addict and the wheels fell off. I was dabbing cocaine into my mouth and rubbing it around my gums to numb the pain’.
Danniella’s frank admissions are heartbreaking. As she breaks down in tears, revealing that she tried to take her life eight or nine times last year, it’s undeniable that her story is a stark warning.
How are you, Danniella?
I’m in a lot of pain and I’m having a tough time but I’m determined to try to get myself back on track.
What’s happened?
Just look at me – look how old I look. After years of drug abuse I look old enough without this happening.
What’s happening?
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