Are You A Check-in, Check-Out Parent?
Young Parents Singapore|December 2018

Travelling for work isn’t always glamorous, especially when you’re leaving behind kids and a spouse who feels stretched thin. Here’s how some families cope with it. By JASSMIN PETER-BERNTZEN

Jassmin Peter-berntzen
Are You A Check-in, Check-Out Parent?

After 11 years of travelling on the job, Lesley Shepherdson Su, 35, a regional training and retail manager, has a solid routine going on.

A few days before her trip, she informs her husband, Joel Su, 37, her mum and helper about her destination, leaving with them her flight and hotel details.

As she packs, Lesley tells her boys Tristan, six, Tyrell, four, and Tilden, two, all about the country she’ll be visiting and after lots of hugs and kisses, she’s off.

Being in the beauty travel retail industry, monthly business trips are part and parcel of Lesley’s job. She does mostly regional hops, visiting countries like Bangkok, Korea, China and Kuala Lumpur across two weeks every month.

Sometimes, she does ad hoc international trips as well. Her travels can last anywhere between three and five days. It’s something her family has gotten used to, but it still comes with its challenges, Lesley admits.

“Tristan was five months when I had to do my first trip after becoming a mum. During the lead-up to it, I was hoping the flight or the meeting would get cancelled. At times, I myself wanted to cancel the trip!” she recalls.

Nor did it get any easier after Tyrell and Tilden came along. “I still WhatsApp my husband and helper all the time to check on the kids,” she adds.

“She can be very annoying when she does that,” Joel jokes.

YOU’RE FREE, I’M SWAMPED

Being married to someone who travels heavily for work can polarise couples in terms of their roles and day-to-day involvement with the family, notes marriage and family therapist Anoushka Beh.

Throw young kids into the mix and the stress levels go up several notches, not just for the parent who has to pull double duty at home, but also for the one who’s juggling hectic travel-schedules with everyday duties in the office and at home.

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