Throughout the first few years of the 2010s, my favourite party story was the tale of how I met my boyfriend.
It was my first day of university, and my lovely new flatmates – on discovering that it was also my 19th birthday – threw an impromptu party. Keen to show my gratitude, and reasoning that I was a sophisticated Londoner who could handle her booze, I chugged down glass after glass of vodka and Coke, prosecco, and a strange sort of ‘punch’ concocted by an eager but inept young ‘mixologist’.
It turned out that, at 19, having spent the last seven years at an all-girls Catholic school, I wasn’t quite as streetwise as I’d imagined. By 8pm, I was fast asleep in front of the fridge and doused – for reasons I still don’t quite understand – in soy sauce.
One of the second-years instructed to keep an eye on us found me lying there, stepped over my sleeping body and made his merry way off to a nightclub. His friend gallantly stepped in, and I was carried off to bed.
I don’t think I ever met my knight in shining armour again. But Mike, the one who made the rapid exit, is now the proud co-owner of my cat – and will probably be stuck with me for life.
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