JENNIFER HENG
On creating a refuge that empowers unsupported pregnant women to make life-giving choices
Motherhood… is very messy, literally, in the early years. You realise that there’s really no routine or formula and we’re all doing our best. As a mother, I began to appreciate a lot more of the difficulties that my own mother went through. I also began to identify with the struggles of other mothers, because a lot of times, it looks very good on the outside — but we are just desperately trying to keep it together. I think, to me, motherhood is not meant to be done alone.
One thing I wish I knew about motherhood… is how important it is to accept yourself for who you are and not have this rosy and standard picture of what motherhood is. But just to know that everyone will have their own way of being a mother; I will be the kind of mother that I am, and I should accept myself for who I am.
I decided to create Safe Place because… when I was pregnant as a teenager, it was a tough time with little information and no support, and I didn’t know what to do. The choices I made then, I regret them now. But I asked myself, if I couldn’t find help then, what help is there now if someone else went through the same thing? There really isn’t much help in Singapore. So, I decided to be the help. Definitely, I was not the only one who went through those difficult situations. And so, I said, someone, ’s got to do something.
Cable knit polo shirt, $269, trousers, $399, and boots, by POLO RALPH LAUREN
JAYNE THAM
On being a step-mum and mother to three boys
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