I ONCE looked after a herd of alpacas. It wasn’t particularly pleasurable. I couldn’t catch them, I could barely herd them, they disliked me immensely and spat at me frequently. By far the worst bit about the job was having to hold the stud while it covered the females. I wouldn’t say watching any animal shag is my idea of fun but standing by while two cottonwool balls on pipe cleaners sit down and whimper, baa and grunt their way to ecstasy really takes the biscuit. Narrowly worse, was taking a terrier round to a friend’s house once to see if their labrador bitch was ready for the pedigree stud. The terrier heroically humped her back leg for the time it took to call for the dog but the stud was far less tenacious – a bit fat and lazy, in fact. We ended up guiding him in and held on while the magic happened; the bitch looked less than amused.
Given the tenacity shown by that terrier, during the Covid puppy boom I volunteered my Griff when another friend was in desperate want for a stud for his Border, assuming it would be a doddle. Bless him, all the ambition was there but the technique was less impressive. He definitely knew he was meant to be doing something, he just wasn’t sure quite where he was meant to be doing it. Several frenetic laps of the yard and some dubious doggy foreplay later, the bitch looked wholly bored, Griff had perfected his action but his geography was shot. After several goes at her ear they finally pieced it together under the table in the garden where we were eating dinner, although despite his efforts and her tolerance no puppies materialised.
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Strength in Numbers -The success of Britain's growing band of Farmer Clusters shows the value in working together and engaging with the public in the name of conservation, says Gabriel Stone
In a world that leans into gloomy headlines, it's important to wave the flag for a refreshing success story. That's especially the case when it comes to our overburdened farming sector and the wider way in which we manage the landscape. Yes, we: everyone can play a role, not least through one inspirational initiative. Ever since a 2013 pilot project by the GWCT in association with Natural England, Farmer Clusters have mushroomed across Britain. Led by farmers with guidance from expert advisers, today's network of about 125 clusters encourages a cohesively managed, locally tailored, larger-scale approach to conservation work.
Going over old ground
Forget modern tractors and minimum tillage - there is something glorious about the sight of farmer, horse and vintage plough in perfect harmony
Return of the natives
There is nothing as satisfying as creating a magical miniature woodland or conservation hedgerow using our native trees - and now is the best time to start.
Tagging the Cornish tunny
Enormous Atlantic bluefin tuna are once again making waves in UK waters almost a century after their showstopping appearance in the North Sea
In it for the long haul
It may have fallen out of favour at the elite level but long-format three-day eventing is still proving popular with grassroots riders
Unpicking the story of hunt buttons
These treasured tokens are bestowed only upon those who go above and beyond in service of their hunt but the rules around them can be complex
A place of tradition in the heart of town
Cordings has helped shape the sartorial landscape of Britain for 185 years, with its classic country tailoring a firm staple of many sporting wardrobes
Don't play it by ear
Hearing loss can have a devastating impact on day-to-day life, making ear protection a non-negotiable piece of field kit
Back to base-ics
Britain's famously unpredictable climate can make staying comfortable in the field a challenge but the right under layers can be a game changer
Stand and deliver
A good stance provides the platform for shotgun marksmanship and is fundamental to consistent success in the field or breaking clays