IT’S A CRAZY WORLD WE LIVE IN TODAY, WHERE WE TAKE JOY IN KNOWING WHAT EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING VIA SOCIAL MEDIA. TO SOME EXTENT, WE’RE ALL STUCK IN THIS CONSTANT GAME OF EMOTIONAL ROULETTE EVERY TIME WE LOG IN. TAMMY CHAN SHARES HOW SHE LEARNT TO STOP COMPARING HERSELF TO THOSE BEHIND THE SCREENS AND STARTED TO LOVE HERSELF DESPITE THE JEALOUSY.
We all have that one person whose life we can’t help but envy. For me, that person is Laura*. I’ve never met her, but I do know everything about her (or at least I think I do) from her social media posts. I scroll through her pictures, wondering what it’s like to sit in a hot air balloon overlooking the skyline of Cappadocia, how tasty that plate of wagyu beef would have been in Reykjavik and how that gorgeous pair of Valentino heels must feel as she tours Cinque Terre. Once I’m done scrolling, I lie on my bed and think about why my life is nothing compared to hers. Why don’t I drive a Range Rover? Will I ever look that good in a bikini? Why wasn’t I blessed with dimples so that I’ll look cute when I smile? What’s it really like to be her? Like clockwork, I would then open my Instagram and upload one of the many travel pictures I’ve been saving in my phone. I waited as the comments and likes came pouring in and within minutes, I gained back the confidence I needed to go on with my day!
THE SAD REALITY
I hate to admit it, but my friends and I used to brainstorm the best time to post a picture just to ensure we get a good amount of likes. For example, if we pick the right filter and post our images between 7pm and 9pm, it’s ‘guaranteed’ that we’ll have at least 50 likes by the time the first minute is up. However, if that doesn’t happen, we’ll delete the picture almost instantly to avoid feeling ‘ashamed’. It’s exhausting and emotionally draining cos if we don’t get the response we desire for the cute selfie we posted, does that mean that people think we’re ugly? Could they tell that we used a slimming app to make our faces look thinner? It’s a continuous circle of wanting affirmation from others and yet, we’re afraid of being judged.
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