Save Your Zombie Marriage Today!

The passion has died – you and Hubby are just going through the motions. Is it too late to inject some life back into your love? 

- Lee Xin Hui

Few moments in life are as defining as when you walk down the aisle and make a solemn vow to cherish the man standing before you “till death do us part”. But the sad truth is that love doesn’t always prevail, even in the absence of obvious triggers like cheating or domestic violence. Andrew Marshall, a marital therapist in Britain, discovered that 24 per cent of the couples who attended his counselling services identified “I love my partner, but I’m no longer in love/My partner no longer loves me” as a problem causing the most distress in their relationship. This is a key theme in his best-selling book, I Love You, but I’m Not in Love with You, which has sold more than 100,000 copies worldwide in 16 languages, and was republished in January to mark its 10th anniversary.

Despite the occasional difficult patches, the couples Andrew saw had stayed married for years. They cared deeply about their partners, but somehow, they also wanted to end the relationship.

How does one go from envisioning a lifetime of happiness to resolutely wanting to end the union?

Unfortunately, the busyness of everyday life can cause many of us to lose sight of the importance of working at our marriages.

“When couples fail to recognise that it’s normal for passion to fade in a stable longterm relationship, they assume that something is wrong,” says Andrew in a Skype interview with Her World. “Instead of trying to resolve the problems, they decide to end things or find someone else to love.”

Stressed-out and sleep-deprived