Travelling Alone Can Be Scary, But I Do It Anyway

This Erzurum native (population 367,250) left her hometown in eastern Turkey when she was 17 and has since lived in six different countries and travelled to more than 30. Wherever she is going, Özge Elif Özer doesn’t believe in letting fear pick her next destination

- Ozge Elif Ozer/Zafigo

WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? My top three fears are: 1) Cockroaches, 2) Losing someone I love, and 3) Being trapped.

What about the fear of travel? I have wondered why women from some countries find travelling alone scarier than others. How do you explain the difference between the responses of two Uber drivers’ to my love for travelling?

The first I met in New York and he was taking me to the airport. From my accent and destination, he gathered I was a tourist and asked me, “Where to next?” I said “Miami, and then I don’t know…” After a 10-minute conversation on where I have been that year, he commented, “That is so cool, you are like a globe trotter, a free spirit.”

About 10 months and six countries after that Uber ride, I got to bore another Uber driver with my travel tales – this time in Kuala Lumpur. At the end of our chat, he asked about my age, religion, and nationality, after which he responded: “Wow, how do your parents let you travel even though they are Muslims? Also, you are like a boy, you went to all those places without anyone… you are not a ‘normal’ girl!” He said it all with a shocked smile. I did not take offence; in him, I heard my father’s worried voice, my neighbour’s judgment, and the stereotypes that are common in my home country of Turkey.

It took me all the way back to my first trip alone and reminded me of all the girls I have met on the rooftops of hostels, the queues at temple entrances, and more on the road. I cherished those women and the stories they told me. I loved one of the girls’ stories about eating a cockroach to overcome her fear – so much so, I actually told it to a guy whom I liked, as if it was my own experience. I’m not proud of it, but it did happen.