REGRETS, I'VE HAD a few. But then again, too few to mention," Frank Sinatra crooned in his 1969 hit "My Way." The song's idea is seductive: that anyone can just declare that what's done is done and move on. Some take the declaration a step further and claim that they have no regrets at all (even to the point of tattooing it on their bodies). Whether an aspiration or an actual philosophy, "no regrets" suggests that life can and should be lived without looking through the rearview mirror.
Easier said than done, though. In 2020, author Daniel H. Pink launched the World Regret Survey, the largest survey on the topic ever undertaken. With his research team, Pink asked more than 15,000 people in 105 countries, "How often do you look back on your life and wish you had done things differently?" Eighty-two percent said regret is at least an occasional part of their life; roughly 21 percent said they feel regret "all the time." Only 1 percent said they never feel regret.
If you are of the "no regrets" school of life, you might think that all this regret is a recipe for unhappiness. But that isn't the case. True, letting yourself be overwhelmed by regret is indeed bad for you. But going to the other extreme may be even worse. To extinguish your regrets doesn't free you from shame or sorrow; it consigns you to make the same mistakes again and again. To truly get over our guilt requires that we put regret in its proper place.
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber ? Sign In
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber? Sign In
Cookies for Forgiveness
My blowup was half-baked. The apology wasn't
Puff the Magic Pastry
It always rises to the occasion
New Year's Traditions Around the World
1 MOST OF US spend the final seconds of each calendar year watching a nearly 12,000-pound geodesic sphere descend over Times Square in New York City.
Mom's Wall-Sign Wisdom
She never met a plaque or bumper sticker she didn't quote
Protect Your 'Holiday Heart'
This joyful time of year can also be dangerously stressful
Heroes of the Holidays
It's not just Santa Claus bringing the holiday magic this season. As you'll see, he's got elves all over.
The Man Who Looks After His Wife's Ex
For him and his bride, \"in sickness and in health\" meant something really special
How Risky Are Those Holiday Cocktails, Really?
The latest recommendations about drinking and your health
HOW ONE KENTUCKY TOWN SAVED ITSELF
Downtown Hazard had lost its small-town mojo to drugs. Former addicts are helping to bring it back.
Dream It, Do It, Done!
Your bucket-list goals, accomplished