On January 19, Bhagwan had a full breakfast, bid farewell to his wife and 11-year-old daughter, and left for Delhi’s Tikri border in a buoyant mood. He had done this every day for the prior two months; he was part of the protest against the Centre’s new farm laws and would ferry vegetables and milk on tractors to replenish stocks at the protest venues.
But, as evening set in that day, Renu started receiving videos that had gone viral on social media; videos of Bhagwan consuming sulphas tablets after making an emotional speech to a crowd. Reports said that there was a “suicide note”in his pocket, in which he lamented the futility of talks between the government and the farmers.
“How could the media call it a ‘suicide note’?” says Renu. “It was the photocopy of a letter he had already discussed with me. He had listed out issues he felt strongly about. At the hospital the next day, he did not once wish to be saved or express sadness. He said this government was not listening to us while we were alive, perhaps it would listen to a corpse.”
Renu says her husband idolised Bhagat Singh. She breaks down every time she remembers her idyllic life with Bhagwan, whom she met in 2008 through her parents and instantly fell in love with. “He encouraged me to study and work,” she says. “I finished my master’s in political science because of him. He was not the insecure type, even though he was less educated. He was quite intelligent, was good at maths and stayed up to date with current affairs.”
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