"It looked different on Google Maps," says photographer Olgun as yet another fist sized rock rings along the Mach-E's underbody protection like a broken bell. "Yes. Yes, it did."
I reply through clenched teeth, thinking very much that my assumption that all OHV (off highway vehicle) trails in the US were pretty much just flat, ungraded dirt roads might have been a bit... optimistic. And that a Mustang Mach-E Rally is not, apparently, a Unimog.
"Don't drive over the pointy ones," announces Olgun, using the voice of a man who fears being stranded. Possibly not unreasonably, and I can't tell whether he's being sarcastic. But he's right. We've been not driving over 'the pointy ones' for a couple of hours, and the trail is not getting easier. We have averaged 2mph. Sigh.
Bluntly, the entire trip has fallen apart in the first three hours. Meticulous planning. Incessant use of Google's aerial imagery. A road book cobbled together from a weighty stack of printouts. All kaput. The idea was simple beat the time set by Google Maps on a set route, via the simple expedient of taking rally style, off-road shortcuts. Do so in Colorado - itself littered with graded dirt roads and off-road trails - using a car fit for the mini expedition. Something fast, all-wheel drive, rugged and... electric. OK, so the last one wasn't a given, but the limited run Ford Mustang Mach-E Rally fits the bill. There's the requisite 480bhp and 700lb ft of torque of the standard GT, but here we have bash plates under suspension lifted an inch, tweaks to the bushings, anti-roll bars and adaptive magnetorheological dampers. A rear spoiler that looks like it's been robbed from the back of a Focus RS, proper rally style wheels and cross-climate tyres. It also has graphics, which we all know to be scientifically proven to be worth 10bhp. All of which are, currently, as useful as teeth made of cheese.
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