There’s nothing wrong with being single on Valentine’s Day, so why does it fill some of us with such dread? Maybe it’s because society views it as a stage that precedes living happily ever after with a partner, rather than a time in our lives that has potential for genuine fulfilment.
Whether being single is a choice or the decision has been taken out of your hands via a break-up or a fruitless search for The One, it makes sense that we should embrace our solo status. We should find enjoyment in dating too, without putting unnecessary pressure on ourselves for it to lead to more.
Michelle Elman, life coach and author, explains how to appreciate single life and avoid the dating traps that can make you feel like a failure in love…
1 TAKE YOURSELF ON DATES
“A few years ago, I was dating a guy who ghosted me. We’d planned to go rock climbing and I was gutted about that being cancelled. I realised I was sick of putting things off just because I didn’t have a date, so I started a ‘Dates Men Have Promised To Take Me On And Haven’t’ list.
“Then I retitled my list, ‘Dates I Am Going To Take Myself On’. At the bottom, I scrawled the words, ‘We don’t wait for men’ and it broadened my horizons.
“I’ve taken a hot-tub boat down the Thames, gone axe-throwing and done an aerial meditation class.”
Love lesson: The problem wasn’t that I was single, it was that I put my life on hold to wait for someone to give me permission to have fun.
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