MARTHA AGUILAR
Lacey, WA
Living with: Depression
It's hard to pinpoint when I started to experience depression. It's not as if there is an X-ray or a blood test that tells you your sadness has morphed into depression. But in my early 20s, I started to have crying episodes I couldn't stop. I didn't fully understand why this was happening, but I would have to get into bed until the episode was over, which often took several hours.
Years later, I had an episode in which I almost took my own life. I was hospitalized and took leave from work for almost a year. I was terrified that I wouldn't ever be well enough again to support myself. I also felt the stigma of depression when people would say things to me like "It's not that bad-you're making a big deal out of nothing" and "Why can't you just get over it?" But I was open to trying anything that might help. I went to a therapist, took new medication, attended Buddhist meditation sessions, tried different coaching techniques, and saw a naturopath, among other things.
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