Waxing and waning

Political attack  jobs being in the news just now, it's worth noting that some of the best ones are inadvertent.

- JANE CLIFTON

A long-ago American politician once reported a rival for threatening him with torture. The threat turned out to be, "I'll hold your feet to the fire." As English was the politician's second language, the expression was unfamiliar and therefore understandably alarming.

Depending on one's pain threshold, a more evilly discomforting threat has recently, if not quite rocked, then greatly bemused the Scottish public. One of its MPs complained that malicious enemies had spitefully booked her in for a bikini wax.

What possible message could these foes be trying to transmit? Various MPs have campaigned for better hygiene and safety standards in beauty salons, but not Karen Adam, the Scottish National MP so cruelly booked to strip down to a pair of paper briefs for a session of considerable discomfort.

Nor had she, to anyone's knowledge, disported herself on the beach or at the pool so as to prompt any nasty judgment about whether epilation was in order and just to be clear, such procedures are emphatically matters for personal preference.